WHERE THE HELL HAVE YOU BEEN LOCA?! PT. 2

If you read my blog on what my 2024 was like, 2025 was worse. Insert all the middle fingers.

And no, that doesn’t mean I’m asking for your pity. It was just a lot, and writing this out is like a mini therapy session for me, and maybe this’ll help someone else not feel so alone since grief can make you feel like that.

2025 started out strong in a sense; I found out I was pregnant just before Valentine’s Day and was able to surprise my husband that day. Just before this, my dad was in and out of the hospital for at least a month or so, not realizing what was to come of it or even the gravity of the situation. My husband and I were trying to plan our announcement around my dad but he kept getting re-admitted to the hospital and no time was ever right to tell my whole family. Finally in April, three weeks before he passed, my husband and I told my immediate family, and that same day, we told his parents. It was a day full of so many happy tears.

Grief truly changes you in a lot of ways and makes you realize what’s important and what’s not. Perspective hits hard. You find out who’s in your corner, and I’m so lucky that the village I have is/was absolutely amazing. Even with the amount of support I had, I went downhill in my mental health and I lost a lot of my joy for photography, and it was hard to photograph/edit. I didn’t realize what an impact losing my dad had on my sense of self, and it’s a work in progress going uphill. I’m still working on my instagram, and trying to post a bit more, and letting my followers know I’m still alive and taking on sessions. lol

I started going to therapy, and was prioritizing my mental health. As my pregnancy was progressing, the aching thought of, “my dad would be so happy to know I’m having a boy near his birthday” was killing me. During the early stages of my grief, my mother-in-law was also dealing with her own very unexpected battle with cancer. Come July, she unfortunately lost her battle. Never did I ever think this was going to be mine and my husband’s year. Thankfully, we could be there for each other in a way we couldn’t explain or seem to understand, and we still feel this surreal life every day.

All while dealing with these two fucking shitty and unexpected family deaths, my mom was having her own health issues throughout the summer up until the end of the year. She is fully recovered, but that was also a lot to deal with when we were all in the early stages of our grief. We are so thankful we fought hard for her to be healthy and that she’s still here with us to be Mame’ to Beckett.

The most amazing joy we received was the birth of our boy, Beckett Gregory, on my dad’s birthday. I was due October 18th, and come the 8th, I had a little scare, and come the 9th, I went into the hospital with the worst contractions. THANK GOD FOR EPIDURALS. lol I had our boy on the 10th, and I knew that it was my dad’s doing. We have the best of both worlds with Beckett; he was born on my dad’s birthday and he’s got my mother-in-laws eyes. He’s perfect in every way and we are so lucky. He was sent to us by his two guardian angels for sure.

With all of this being said, if you’ve made it this far, thank you. I want to extend my sincerest thank you’s to those who had reached out, sent flowers with condolences, gift cards, or came to our home with a homemade meal. You really don’t know what it’s like until you’ve been through it and my god does it suck. Having wonderful, understanding people by your side makes one hell of a difference. Your support during that hard time did not go unnoticed, and we are both so grateful.

With so much love and gratitude,

Dana

Mom and dad, we love you and miss you every minute, of every single day. Love, Josh + Dana |

Mom and dad, we love you and miss you every minute, of every single day. Love, Josh + Dana |

P.S.

If you know someone going through some kind of loss, don’t be afraid to ask about their person. We want to talk about them; it makes us feel like they’re still here.